Eleven things learnt in Cannes 2009

In no particular order then, here we go:

1. Winning the big one

Oh man, South Africa bringing home two Cannes Lion Grands Prix is quite an amazing thing, isn't it? Being part of one of the agencies, Net#work BBDO, that won its second Grand Prix in three years, and being there to bask in its glory, is even better. What a proud night that was (two Bronzes the next night ain't too shabby, either).

The Big Lion has mystical powers, I tell you, like the ‘precious' from Lord of the Rings. As you lug that great hunk of shiny down the street, people gather; they want to be near it, they want to touch it and have their photo taken with it. People give you VIP passes, champagne and high-fives everywhere you go. It's pretty awesome.

I wasn't even personally involved in that work so I'd like to give a big shout out all those people back here at home that put in the hard work on those great ads. Thanks so much for letting us steal a little of your thunder, you're awesome!

On a side note, I'd like to mention that one ECD was injured in the making of that celebration. Rob Mclennan popped a knee out busting an unusually complex dance move in a fit of grand revelry. Good one, Limping Otter, you're the man!

2. Prepare to be judged

Wow, what an honour it was so be selected as a member of the Print/Press jury in Cannes, sitting next to the guy who did all the great Skittles and Miller work. I mean, what a trip. Judging was really heavy at times. Emotions ran high and the brutal slaughter led to the shortest print shortlist ever (they even made the font bigger in the Lions Daily mag to fill the space), so if you made it on there, you should be really proud.

Looking back I can see how things get talked up and swayed in the room, but overall I found it a really great and inspiring experience. I made some great friends and learnt some great lessons. But my best part has got to be how the Brazilians blatantly big-up their own work, haha! The dude bought us all gifts every day, formed survivor-type alliances with other judges and eventually on the last day was caught shamelessly voting for his own agency's work. Hilarious!

3. The work, the work, the work

Sometimes the stuff that wins is pretty confusing and you still get the wild cards that slip in, but on the whole, I'd say that one thing stays constant - it's still the BIG IDEA that wins. If you've got a great big awesome amazing idea, then it absolutely can't be denied, whoever the judges are and wherever they come from. You can put it in a magazine, send it on Twitter or make a viral film about it, but if it's crap - it's crap and if it's Gold, then it's Gold, baby, yeah!

4. The recession, Twitter, interactive marketing, social networking blah blah blah

Enough already, we know!

5. Michael Jackson R.I.P.

It was quite surreal to hear of Michael Jackson's untimely demise in the middle of the night on the mad streets of Cannes. All the clubs and bars were playing his tunes non-stop. A big bunch of us stragglers from the SA Party were heading to the Kebab Shop (best midnight snack in Cannes, and the owner speaks Afrikaans) next door to Sun7 (bar where the SA contingent gather to drink champagne and celebrate winnings) when we heard the news.

So we got a laptop out and had a little musical tribute session in the street. I vaguely remember one of the dudes from Jupiter filming a tribute video there, too. I'd like to see that.

6. The Brown Lion

So once again South Africa got the Big Brown Lion for Film. Lame.

It's been a long time since we really ruled it in film but it's also been a long time since we've eaten quite this much brown. I thought we had some good work in there; I thought we had some chances, but alas... I went to watch the shortlist (oh sorry, did I say shortlist? I meant sh*tlist) and got all bleak and depressed about the quality of the work in there, and then I stormed out.

I don't really know what to say, or how to explain it, except to repeat what everyone always says every year: “Cannes is a lottery.” Anyway, good on you guys for the two shortlists; pity they didn't convert.

7. The SA Party

Okay, so I'm not just saying this cos I was one of the DJs, but it seriously was one of the coolest parties of the week. Don't ask me, ask the Dutch guy who was waxing lyrical about it at 3.30am to all his friends at the Carlton or the clutch of stuck-outsiders on the pavement gathering to bask in relative approximation of the awesome SA vibes like moths to a flame.

And if that's not enough to convince you then let me tell you this: Tony Koenderman was dropping it like it's hot in the middle of a hip-hop dance circle to whoops of excitement. For realzees my homies, I kid you not, I have photographic evidence and everything! Nuff said.

8. The Bob Geldof talk

Well, it was actually the Kofi Anan talk, and he's only the head mofo of the United Nations, but Bob totally stole the show. It was a talk about the Global Climate Crisis and the serious pile of dung we silly little humans have got ourselves into.

I have never been so moved by such a passionate speech in all my life. By the end the people both sides of me were in tears (I'm not saying who they were, but one of them may or may not have been James Daniels) and he got a full auditorium standing ovation.

I'm not gonna try give you the whole story but I would urge you to go check out the full ACT Responsible lecture film for yourself at www.canneslions.com, and then visit www.timeforclimatejustice.org to see how you (and your clients) can do your part.

Come on, man, the clock is ticking!

9. Hitting the wall

It's a term most commonly used by marathon runners, and during the Comrades it usually happens about three-quarter way through, right by Polly Shorts. Well, same thing happens in Cannes, because it is essentially a marathon week of partying, lectures, drinking and 4am bedtimes. So eventually, even the hardest of men hit the wall.

In my experience, this usually happens on the Thursday night. You just suddenly lose your sense of humour, want to have an early night (and by that I mean only six beers, two tequilas and 1am bedtime) and cry yourself to sleep in the foetal position while sucking your thumb and wishing you were home. Some people manage to pull themselves out of this downward spiral by sucking it up and having a pint for lunch the next day, for others it's the end.

10. The Gutter Bar

What the hell is up with that place? I mean, it's not like magic moments don't happen there. I actually spent the coolest/weirdest three hours there between 2am and 5am with Rob Mclennan and an awesome guy who was the radio judge from Australia but also a mercenary soldier. He was leaving to Iraq for para-training the day judging was finishing, and he cried a lot that night; he drank a lot that night too, mind you. (God Bless you Paul, be safe mate.)

But besides that, what is up with the Gutter Bar? I mean, surely the world's best creatives can think of somewhere cooler to spend the majority of their week than a shitty, brightly-lit corner café that plays eurotrash music, charges you to use the toilet and sells beer for 11 Euros each?

11. Home sweet home

One of the coolest things about hanging out with international men of advertising (and women, it just doesn't work as well that way) is realising how good we've got it back here at home. I mean, we still got the recession but it isn't hitting us quite as hard. We still got bad clients, but they are pretty damn sweet in comparison. And hell, we get work done!

I met guys from London and New York that haven't got a single piece of work through research and done in over a year! Seriously, cherish this place and the great opportunities we get as young people in advertising here, cos the grass just ain't greener on the other side.

Au revoir then, 'til next Cannes.