Terrorism and violence: new brand watchwords?

Blowing up a goal? Of all the 3D concepts out there, they choose to blow something up? Come off it.

I can't remember if there's a goalie in that ad; but still, even if there's not, what about people who've had loved ones blown up in goals? What about 9/11? What kind of idiot brand blows up a goal at the world cup... hey? What do they think Osama Bin Laden's going to do when he sees that ad (on his brand new Sony 3D TV?) He's going to raise his bushy eyebrow and say, "Ah... there's a good idea. Why didn't I think of that?"

It's those advertising people, man, they're to blame, I'm telling you. I know those people (not the Sony ones, particularly, I know other ones.) But I'm sure they're the same the world over.

If that creepy Coca-Cola Quest ad is any indication, these corporate brands are all out to get us. I'm serious! That little computer boy reminds me of Chucky (especially when he smiles.)

[People, this isn't a race thing, okay? It's not. If some white kid came down from a garbage dump or whatever, grabbed a stick, and ran off with it, wired on Coke, I'd be just as terrified. I sure as hell wouldn't want to meet that kid in an alley. These white kids today, hey...]

Anyway, that's exactly what happens. That little dude gets his fix of Coke and goes running off with a big stick. Here, look for yourself.

You check? He takes a good look at that stick, hey, he wants that stick. What's he going to do with it? I'll tell you what he's going to do. He's going to find other dudes with sticks, and they're going to drink more Coke and run around causing mayhem.

What's in that Coke anyway? Sugar or aspartame, and carbon dioxide - that's bad stuff, man.

I question the wisdom of these brands, I do. I wonder about their intentions, too. Me, I think displaying something on TV promotes it. Showing a goal being blown up and showing some computerised kid running off with a stick in his hand is promoting violence and terrorism.

These brands mustn't be out to get me, hey, not unless they want a fight. I don't want a fight. That's the last thing I want. I only want laughs. I'm serious. But I have a boy of my own to think about, and that supersedes my comfort zone.

Blowing up goals and promoting stick-waving to sell Coca-Cola is a no-no in my book. These corporations have responsibilities, man.

Last updated at 1.30pm on 9 July 2010.