The answer is tact and here are seven ways to inject it into business writing.
Tone is the writing between the lines. The message conveyed by a whole lot of things other than the actual words you use. In essence, it's the 'body language' of writing. And it's something you can change, depending on the circumstances.
The challenge is that tone is often the part that goes wrong, because it's highly subjective, so you need to choose your tone deliberately, carefully and with sufficient advance attention to both the content and the context of the message.
Content is what you want to convey. It's useful to think of this in terms of outcome, not in terms of the message itself. What's your objective? What do you hope the reader will do once he/she has assimilated your writing?
Context relates directly to the person you're addressing: Are they superiors? Subordinates? Equals? What is the length or level of formality of the relationship? How accurately can you anticipate how they'll respond?
Keeping both of these factors in mind, try to work out the tone that would be most appropriate for addressing this audience, given what you need them to know and how much you can get away with. Ask yourself, "If I were X, what would offend me? What would work best when dealing with me? And do I care enough about the consequences of this confrontation to go that route?"
The position of positive and negative information in a message is important. 'Good' news should appear in a position of high emphasis - at the beginnings and ends of letters, paragraphs and sentences - while 'bad' news should appear in secondary positions: right in the centre of letters, paragraphs and sentences.
In The Business Writer, Van Rys, Meyer and Sebranek recommend the BEBE format for bad news: "Buffer, Explanation, Bad news (plus alternative) and Exit".
The less you say and the more cleanly and concisely you express your point/s, the less room there is to a) make a tit of yourself, b) slide into emotional blathering and c) have your words come back to bite you later on.
To check the overall tone before delivering a message, consider asking for a second opinion from a trusted colleague. This can help to ensure that your message can't be mistaken as rude, arrogant or condescending. Remember: when it comes to tone, it's very hard for any writer to be truly objective.
There's nothing worse than a trite, stuffy, bog-standard piece of officialese when it comes to handling something sensitive. Yes, your you-know-what is covered, but the reader tends to get more revved than necessary because he/she doesn't perceive you as a real person. You're the robot; the bad guy's gatekeeper.
So even when you have to use a template or certain pre-determined wording to get your message across accurately and in line with your organisation's policy, try to show that there's a human being there as well. One who empathises.
Good luck. Remember that tone is a tricky beast and that your best weapon in the conflict/confrontation battle is preparation, care and 10 very deep breaths.
